Selah - Pausing for Silent Meditation

"...I said to myself, ' I will confess my rebellion to the Lord. And you forgave me! All my guilt is gone! Selah* " Psalm 31:5b

Do you ever follow those little asterisks in your bible down to the subtext? A few weeks ago, I did this for the word "Selah." I've been doing some research and what I've read has been interesting. (see below for a summary)

In the end, for me the action the word calls us to when reading is key! Similar to a musical rest in a piece of music which causes dramatic pause, I understand "Selah" as a moment of silent reflection. In light of that, when I read a section of scripture and get to this word, I pause my reading and meditate on it. I think more deeply about what the writer has just written, how I can relate, and what it means in my own life. 

Try it! It can be powerful if you dig deep. Here are just a few that you can practice reading, pausing, and meditating on this morning. 

• For you [God] are my hiding place; you protect me from trouble. You surround me with songs of victory. Selah  - Psalm 32: 7
• So many are saying, 'God will never rescue him!'...I cried out to the Lord, and he answered me from his holy mountain. Selah - Psalm 3:2 & 4
• ...Each of us is but a breath. Selah - Psalm 39:11
• Everything on earth will worship you; they will sing your praises, shouting your name in glorious songs. Selah - Psalm 66:4

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"Selah (/ˈsiːlə/; Hebrew: סֶלָה‎, also transliterated as selāh) is a word used seventy-four times in the Hebrew Bible—seventy-one times in the Psalms and three times in Habakkuk. The meaning of the word is not known, though various interpretations are given below. (It should not be confused with the Hebrew word sela‘ (Hebrew: סֶלַע‎) which means "rock".) It is probably either a liturgico-musical mark or an instruction on the reading of the text, something like "stop and listen." Selah can also be used to indicate that there is to be a musical interlude at that point in the Psalm.^[1] The Amplified Bible translates selah as "pause, and think of that." It can also be interpreted as a form of underlining in preparation for the next paragraph.

At least some of the Psalms were sung accompanied by musical instruments and there are references to this in many chapters. Thirty-one of the thirty-nine psalms with the caption "To the choir-master" include the word selah. Selah may indicate a break in the song whose purpose is similar to that of Amen (Hebrew: "so be it") in that it stresses the truth and importance of the preceding passage; this interpretation is consistent with the meaning of the Semitic root ṣ-l-ḥ also reflected in Arabic cognate salih (variously "valid" [in the logical sense of "truth-preserving"], "honest," and "righteous"). Alternatively, selah may mean "forever," as it does in some places in the liturgy (notably the second to last blessing of theAmidah). Another interpretation claims that selah comes from the primary Hebrew root word salah (סָלָה) which means "to hang," and by implication to measure (weigh)".^{[2] - Wiki}

Our Family's "DO NOT BOOK" Anniversary

“What is this life so full of care,
We don't have time to stand and stare.” ― W.H. Davies

Today, I'm celebrating!!! One year ago I made a simple change to set a reoccurring appointment for one Saturday per month that says, "DO NOT BOOK." Maybe I was at church trying to schedule time with a close friend and realized we had no time...for months ahead. Maybe I had been longing for the carefree days of my youth when the morning sun would call me to spend the rest of the day outside playing, taking naps under the front porch swing or having pretend adventures up in the pasture. Whatever the trigger, life needed to have more space and time to dream, imagine, create and rest. That day when I looked across the living room at my new daughter, I realized she hadn't had those type of childhood experiences and she was possibly running out of time to have this leisure in her youth! Her life had been a whirlwind before our adoption and was picking up speed into her last years of high school. Next, she'd plow into the college years, jobs, possibly marriage and children. This little bit of time we have is so precious...and certainly it's my job to protect it!!!! 

You would think that reserving 12 little Saturdays out of the year where we book nothing would be easy BUT, let me just tell you it was hard. Yet as I stood my ground on this decision, I've seen the blessings.

So you may wonder what my daughter does on these days? Well, she sleeps until 11am. Yup, and I totally support that 'cause the girl needs sleep!  When she gets up she may have a late breakfast,and afterwards wander into the backyard with her sunglasses on to read her newest book while laying under our monster fig tree. She piddles, rests, and thinks (or not...because sometimes you need your mind to stop!) My son tends to get up earlier than her so after breakfast he goes and gets all smelly (as boys should) while playing with the kids across the street. They play"infection" (for us older folks, that's the modern day version of freeze tag) and they have Nerf gun battles galore! Me? I get caught up on laundry, dishes, and housework. NOT!!!!!! I may read my own newest book or an old classic then take a much deserved nap, or maybe crochet and sit in silence, craft or twenty other "me" things I long to do but normally need to push aside. 

When I look back over my childhood, I'm so thankful that my parents didn't allow all my days to be filled to the brim. That precious time of my past is why I can self-entertain today and not get as swept up in the chaotic life that swirls around me. Children need an emotional and physical margin so they can be kids and as keeper of the calendar, I take it as an honored responsibility to give them the sanctuary of this precious time. 

Creativity Prompts

Taken on a recent walk on my block

Lately, my creativity has been vaporized. I've been wanting to be artistic and do something inspiring but, alas, I'm too haggard by the end of the day to even think. I won't say that suddenly being a single, 42 year old mom of two older children is the reason...however, the lifestyle change cannot be denied. :) Still...#adoptionrocks.

So last night I left the kids to their own devices, locked my master suite door and have hidden myself away so that I could lead my heart and mind towards something imaginative. (or at least briefly stimulating) While searching for writing prompts, I scrolled across three prompts that hinted at being deserving of attention. Maybe they will inspire you as you read along as well.

• Name three places that make you feel whole. 
• What do you never want to forget about yourself or your life right now?
• Make a list of 10 things you want to stop overthinking.

My Three Places: Being in the sanctuary of my master bedroom gives me privacy, calmness and more wholeness. It's a warm, clean, and spacious chamber filled with reminders of past adventures, future dreams and modern comforts. My backyard is another place where a feeling of wholeness swiftly yet sensitively embraces me. The grass is lush and my massive fig tree shelters me from most of my neighbors' view. There I can rest, think and read quietly as birds chirps and a few mutts bark. The third "place" that I feel whole inside is a secret place of my spirit when I take communion on my knees. Even if loads of people are around me, while on my knees during this time, I feel simply drawn close to God...the ultimate Home for me. 

Cementing This Time: This is a curious prompt but one that I knew fit well for this time in my life. I would never want to forget the past few months as I've fought hard to stay centered and build my family through adoption. I'd like to remember how many times my son has expressed his view of me, "You are always happy." This seems strange to me since, in my book at least, I've lost my patience an extreme amount of times. But I know that in my perceptions of events, I often cast myself in a negative light. So, may I remember instead that many times I'm a hero in my own life story. 

My Top 6 List of Overthinking (which was written as 10 above but six was all that came to mind...yay!)

1. If the words I share about life, wisdom and Jesus are enough for my children to heal and grow?
2. If my children feel my love and care or do they feel overwhelmed by redirection?
3. What work will be like with a new boss?
4. Do I have ample savings?
5. Is Trickle (dominate, resident cat) really sick or does she just have bad allergies?
6. Where did all my creativity go?

I'm hopeful this little post will help me get into my creative routine again and inspire someone else too. Thanks for reading!

Embrace the Mystery

Currently, I'm waiting to get news on when a staffing meeting will be held by the state to decide whether or not I'd be a good match for a preteen boy who needs a forever family. There is a lot of hopefulness that I'll get picked and also a ton of waiting right now which can make me impatient. All the workers are probably busy with helping other grateful families during National Adoption Month and also the Thanksgiving holiday being right around the corner could delay things. So I find myself moving between content in the timing and impatient for answers. And let me just tell you, "impatience for answers" is never a healthy place for me to camp out. So tonight, I'm spending some time with God meditating on the beauty of mystery. I've been in the bible, in some poetry books and searching online on the topic of mystery. This time reflecting on the mysteries of God has been so refreshing. I'm finding that an amazing calmness springs up in my heart as I embrace how mysterious the Lord is in everything He orchestrates. Here's just a taste...enjoy! 
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1 Timothy 3:16 "Without question, this is the great mystery of our faith: Christ was revealed in a human body and vindicated by the Spirit. He was seen by angels and announced to the nations. He was believed in throughout the world and taken to heaven in glory." 

A.W. Tozer, " We cover our deep ignorance with words, but we are ashamed to wonder, we are afraid to whisper mystery." 

Ecc. 11:5 TLB, God’s ways are as mysterious as the pathway of the wind and as the manner in which a human spirit is infused into the little body of a baby while it is yet in its mother’s womb. 

Matthew Henry commentary on Ecc. 11 [para] - We don't know the way of the Spirit. We know not when it comes, or when it goes, or when it will turn. The same can be said of the human soul; we know that God made us, and gave us these souls, but how our specific souls entered into these bodies, are united to them, animate them, and operate upon them, we can't understand! The soul is a mystery. For all that we do know, we cannot describe the infusing of the body with a soul; both, we know, are the work of God, and we yield to in his work, but cannot trace the process of the operation. And because of this great mystery and his powerful working, we may well trust God to provide for us... 

Build, with faith, in the wait.

New table - has butterfly leaf that transforms it to seat 8 people!

Lately, I think I've been nesting again. Life with my daughter is going amazing and although God's not opened the door yet for another child for me or a sibling for her, we've been doing what families do...soaking up life together.

We have also been preparing for the upcoming holidays. Our Halloween yard decorations are planned already since she has begged me to "make it legit this year, Mom." *laughing* Done, girl. Recently, I bought a beautiful dining room table and chairs that seats up to 8 people. I was a bit cautious at first but, after visiting 10 stores looking for the perfect table, I'm ecstatic with this buy. Our new table has already gotten so much use now that we have something larger and a bit more comfy. Another holiday I recently made a purchase for was Christmas. I swooped up a dreamy Christmas tree! This artificial tree stands proudly at 7.5 ft. and is heavily flocked with long needles and gentle, white lights.

So what's with all the money spending? Well, I've been praying about that and thinking a lot about my purchases to check my motives. (Do you ever do that?) The only way I can explain it is that when I "nest" I'm building, with faith, in the wait. This is not the first time I've done this either. For example, I just celebrated the five year anniversary of purchasing my home. Five short years ago, I bought a three bedroom home as a single woman. This.was.a.faith.move. I had no one to fill the house. No potential female roommates from church, no children, and I wasn't dating anyone but God drew me to the home. I knew it as soon as I walked through the door that I was suppose to buy this house and I knew He would fill it and make it a home! So in the meantime I nested. Even back then, I built, with faith, in the wait until finally, BAM, I have a daughter! Ha. #adoptionrocks

And I'm waiting again. I'm waiting for God to add to my family because something in my spirit tells me God's not done. I have no clue on his timing. I have zero information on the plans He's drawn up but I'm committed to keep building with faith during this wait. After all, there is only two of us in my home right now but I just bought a table for eight! That's a faith move! But I believe God can fill it...one way or another and if He does, my home will be ready. This morning, I can say with confidence, "My God is up to something!" I can't tell you exactly what, who, or even when but I feel His prompting as He's preparing my heart so I'm preparing too. I want to be ready.

Are you waiting on something to happen that God's placed on your heart? How are you building, with faith, during your wait? I think for many of us, it's hard to make faith moves because we think more about how stupid we'd feel if things don't turn out than about how much it pleases God to take steps of faith! So let me remind you...if you make faith moves, God can come through. Don't you believe that He wants to come through?! Work on stretching your faith and be bolder. Have faith in God.
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Faith verses to ponder: 

2 Samuel 22:26 “To the faithful you [God] show yourself faithful; to those with integrity you show integrity.

Psalm 119:30 "I have chosen to be faithful; I have determined to live by your [the Lord's] regulations.

Isaiah 7:9 "But this is what the Sovereign Lord says...Unless your faith is firm, I cannot make you stand firm.” 

Habakkuk 2:4 “...But the righteous will live by their faithfulness to God.

Matthew 9:29 "Then he [Jesus] touched their eyes and said, “Because of your faith, it will happen.”

Matthew 15:28 “Dear woman,” Jesus said to her, “your faith is great. Your request is granted.” And her daughter was instantly healed.

Matthew 17:20-21 “You don’t have enough faith,” Jesus told them. “I tell you the truth, if you had faith even as small as a mustard seed, you could say to this mountain, ‘Move from here to there,’ and it would move. Nothing would be impossible. Then Jesus told them, “I tell you the truth, if you have faith and don’t doubt, you can do things like this and much more. You can even say to this mountain, ‘May you be lifted up and thrown into the sea,’ and it will happen.”

Matthew 21:22 "You can pray for anything, and if you have faith, you will receive it.” ~Jesus

Galatians 5:22 "But the Holy Spirit produces this kind of fruit in our lives: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness..."

2 Thessalonians 1:11 "So we keep on praying for you, asking our God to enable you to live a life worthy of his call. May he give you the power to accomplish all the good things your faith prompts you to do.

Hebrews 11:1 "Faith is the confidence that what we hope for will actually happen; it gives us assurance about things we cannot see.

Hebrews 11:6 "And it is impossible to please God without faith. Anyone who wants to come to him must believe that God exists and that he rewards those who sincerely seek him.

James 1:2-4 "Dear brothers and sisters, when troubles of any kind come your way, consider it an opportunity for great joy. For you know that when your faith is tested, your endurance has a chance to grow. So let it grow, for when your endurance is fully developed, you will be perfect and complete, needing nothing.

New Christmas Tree

The Comfort Embrace

This picture makes me smile because the angle
makes her hair seem super long! But it's the horse's tail. ha

Over the past year it has happened several times, but there are two times I remember being surprised by it. Once when my daughter returned from the most recent church teen camp and then today. Being that my girl will be 17 years old in a few months, I am shocked each time it happens. It's what I call "the comfort embrace."

When Rene' got off the bus after being gone for a week at camp, I guess I expected her to be a bit stand-offish with me while around her peers but instead, she bounced off the bus and straight into my arms in full view of, well everyone. And it wasn't a quick hug...it was a full on, let me stand here and be held embrace. I felt so loved!

Today, she spent time with new friends and had a day full of horseback riding and swimming. [More pics below] I picked her up from a local ranch and when she saw me, she walked up to me, "fell" into my arms and again just stood there in my embrace. 

So as I was driving us home today, the story of the Prodigal Son came to mind. I tend to picture that returning son falling into the arms of a comfort embrace with his Dad [Luke 15]. The embrace is one of those, "I'm so tired and glad to be with you that I just want to be held" type of hugs. And I REALLY want this type of relationship with God! But I found myself wondering when the last time was that I just "fell" into His loving embrace or cuddled snugly into the hope of my salvation or even let myself rest in the comfort of all that Christ's love is in my life? I think it's been too long! Do I even view God as the God of Comfort? Am I forgetting how much he loves to have me in a Comfort Embrace? Yes. I've forgotten that lately. And I don't think I reflect on Him as the Lord who loves to comfort us - but He totally does! 

So, as I'm looking up "comfort" in the bible, I'm seeing how MUCH our God really loves to comfort us and how He continually wants us in His Comfort Embrace! Want proof? Here are some verses I've been reflecting on - may they bring you comfort too. 

• Isaiah 40:1-3Comfort for God's People -  “Comfort, comfort my people, says your God. “Speak tenderly to Jerusalem. Tell her that her sad days are gone and her sins are pardoned."

• Isaiah 57: 18-19, "I have seen what they do, but I will heal them anyway! I will lead them. I will comfort those who mourn, bringing words of praise to their lips. May they have abundant peace, both near and far,” says the Lord, who heals them."

• Isaiah 61:1 [ Good News for the Oppressed ] The Spirit of the Sovereign Lord is upon me [Jesus - ref. Luke 4], for the Lord has anointed me to bring good news to the poor. He has sent me to comfort the brokenhearted and to proclaim that captives will be released and prisoners will be freed.

• 2 Corinthians 1:3 [ God Offers Comfort to All ] "All praise to God, the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ. God is our merciful Father and the source of all comfort." ...and verses 4-5

• Also read - Zechariah 1:12-14

• Psalm 94: 19, "When doubts filled my mind, your comfort gave me renewed hope and cheer." 

• Psalm 119: 50, "Your promise revives me; it comforts me in all my troubles."

• Psalm 86: 17b, "...for you, O Lord, help and comfort me. 

• Psalm 23:4 HCSB, "Even when I go through the darkest valley, I fear no danger, for You are with me; Your rod and Your staff - they comfort me."

Deep Roots with God

Take a look at this tree in the picture below. It's obviously fallen, taken a beating in the Texas heat, and is under distress. But besides that, do you notice how most of this tree's leaves are still green? Take note with me that, even though it's fallen, instead of removing it and chopping it up for wood, the business has simply mowed around it. This intrigues me! This fallen tree has become a daily reminder to me about the value of having deep roots with God. You see, this tree fell months ago.

I'm not sure what happened. One day I drove by on my way to work and suddenly there it was in the grass looking as though it's completely disconnected. It's one of those things you notice casually at first and give only a passing thought to but then as the days, weeks, and months have gone by, it seems to whisper a valiant reminder and I marvel. 

In one way or another, we can all relate to this fallen tree. Over the past few weeks, I've felt knocked over. Besides Miss M. deciding she'd rather age out of foster care than be adopted by any family and that I have been extremely sick, I've felt impoverished artistically. Although this may seem small to most people, my fellow creatives know what a big deal that can be! I also have felt depleted of inspiration to blog. I'm struggling to feel inspired towards adventure. And most importantly, I'm lacking depth or emotions in my coffee and cozy times with God. : (  

But God is always showing himself to be fabulously faithful! And recently He reminded me of this tree. This tree obviously has one heck of a deep root! So today I've searched out scriptures to share and I hope they inspire you as well. May your roots go deep with God, my friend!

The bible says: 

"But blessed are those who trust in the Lord and have made the Lord their hope and confidence. They are like trees planted along a riverbank, with roots that reach deep into the water. Such trees are not bothered by the heat or worried by long months of drought. Their leaves stay green and they never stop producing fruit." Jeremiah 17:7-9

"I pray that from his [God's] glorious, unlimited resources he will empower you with inner strength through his Spirit. Then Christ will make his home in your hearts as you trust in him. Your roots will grow down into God's love and keep you strong. And may you have the power to understand, as all God's people should, how long, how high, and how deep his love is." Ephesians 3:16-18

"And now, just as you accepted Christ Jesus as your Lord, you must continue to follow him. Let your roots grow down into him, and let your lives be built on him. Then your faith will grow strong in the truth you were taught, and you will overflow with thankfulness." Colossians 2:6-8