Wednesday, April 25, 2012

I Forgive...Me!

Something I've been struggling with lately is being super hard on myself. I've seen my perfectionism come out over the past few weeks. If I 'mess up' even the smallest thing, my inner monologue toward myself dwells on it. Really, these mistakes are barely 'mess ups' but when I don't do things as well as I think I should...ouch.

We often focus on the forgiveness we extend to others and receive from them and the forgiveness of God but lately I've been talking to people about their process of 'forgiving' themselves. If you have any thoughts, please comment.

A friend from church the other day shared something he does while praying through the Lord's prayer. When he gets to the section in Matthew 6:11-12, "Give us today the food we need, and forgive us our sins, as we have forgiven those who sin against us," he'll take a moment to forgive himself.

I think this is lovely so I've started doing it as well. I really desire to have a clear heart so I can focus on God. I don't want my harshness or critical attitude toward myself to get in the way of thinking about God. And let's face it, when I'm being hateful toward me...I'm not thinking of God!! Besides, I already have an enemy (boo-satan) and I sure don't need two!

I just recently wrote a note that I keep at my desk saying, "I do not have to be perfect. I will never do everything right." A picture I saw once that fits this sentiment well has the quote, "In Jesus, I am enough." I also saw suggestions from others of writing yourself a forgiveness letter because this can help those of us who are visual and writers. It's been good to talk to others and see that I'm not the only one who has this struggle.

Making amends. Reconciliation. This is the heart of God and I'm seeing that those very things are just what we need to extend to ourselves sometimes..

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